Monday, December 31, 2012

Word for 2013

Hot on the heels of the Butterfly post (well... hot for me... it's only been two weeks since my last post!)... my word for 2013 is... EMERGE

It fits.  I've been steadily plugging away for years... addressing myself and my belief systems... where they feed me and where they do not.  I've been accumulating knowledge of healing arts, herbalism, and deep listening.  I have applied them to myself over and over, learning something new each time.  In a way, I cocooned years ago and reorganized my academic mind into something open enough to embrace my intuition.  I allowed flow to happen when I'd only ever been taught to hold.  What was once taught to me as "the way it is" was disassembled, assessed, and either let go or replaced freshly cleaned up.  I dismantled so many webs of entanglement with my family, my culture, my Self... and now... now it's time to acknowledge the framework for living that really belong to ME... and to emerge from my cocoon.

I guess it's no small coincidence that I cocooned very consciously at 12-12-12 (though I didn't realize the link with a long history of cocooning at that time).  I don't really know what it will entail to EMERGE.  Although, last night I had a dream of what is coming.  All of a sudden I have a clearer sense of the butterfly I am going to be.  I don't know where she will fly... but I am getting my first glimpses of those wet wings unfurling.

from the Merriam-Webster Dictionary (parenthetical comments mine)

1.  To become manifest : become known
2.  To rise from or as if from an enveloping fluid : come out into view (like from a cocoon!)
3.  To rise from an obscure or inferior position or condition
4.  To come into being through evolution (oh YES!)

Well... it seems that this will be an interesting year.  I'm excited, and nervous... I mean... I don't know where this is going... what it means I will face this year... but I do know that it's going to be exactly right for me.

Wednesday, December 12, 2012


Today is 12-12-12... what, for me, is the beginning of getting ready for a new way of life.  I don't expect anything dramatic to happen on 12-21-12... at least not at first.  Though we may be in a new astrological time, past the Mayan calendar, in a shift in consciousness... I imagine life is going to feel pretty much the same after 12-21-12.  That's just my belief, and where I'm coming from here.

Anyway, I'm seeing 12-12-12 as a time to begin my own shift.  From the life I've had... the alignments I've had... to a new way of living my life that's more satisfying.  Just like I don't expect much to change in the "outside" world, I don't expect my inner shift to be all that dramatic either.  I'm just ready to take the steps that need to happen for there to be less arguing and strife and drama in my life, and more enjoyable moments that feed me and my family.

With that in mind, I decided to align with butterfly for this season.  She's beautiful... that butterfly... how she can transform her body and life from that of the caterpillar to that of the butterfly.  Seemingly... it's a whole new animal... that eats different food, has a different mode of movement, a completely different body... and yet, is truly the same individual that she was before... her essence remains steady.  Each of her cells contained the DNA that manifests one way (caterpillar)... or the other (butterfly)... and a shift happens in between... turning on things that had been dormant... and turning off some things that had been active.  And the essence of her... it is on in both forms... her heart still beats... her digestion is still there... blood still flows.

So today, I did a ritual a bit like that.  I made a paper cloak that I wrote old things on that I no longer want to be part of my life... judgment, resentment, shame...

...and I burned it.  I released it to the power of fire to transmute.

Then, once it was released, I cleansed myself (my arms and face) to clean out the residues... to bring myself back to the essence of my center.

And then I sang and I danced... first in letting go and shedding... and then the other way... building my cocoon for the next 11 days.

I finished this ritual feeling hopeful and cleansed... open to what is building up to the equinox.  I have plans for that day too... my family included.  This cocoon thing... this is just for me... to be conscious of my own intentions for transformation, both within and without.

Blessings this transformational season!

Oh... and I had to leave this post to go get my kids from school... and I saw a rainbow!  Wow... what an afternoon!