Addressing exhaustion...

Hello, my dear body. I feel that you are tired. I'm hearing from others that exhaustion is taking its toll. I feel the quiet in the earth as she starts to settle in after the harvest.


Know that even in the fatigue, you are physically strong. See your wholeness, your completeness, the totality of you. See that your body contains bone... which holds you up and supports you with no extra effort needed. Acknowledge the work that your bones do each and every day... without thought. Half of the support structure lies in the bones. But also know that half of your strength lies in the fluids in your body. Water is not compressible, it provides the sole support for many plants (known as turgor pressure, if I my memory of college botany serves). The strength of fluid lies not only in its resistance to being compressed, but also in its ability to flow. That ability to be strong AND flexible inherently lies in our bodies.

Our energetic strength lies in presence... in grounding. Bring an awareness to the fact that your body comes from the earth. The body is made of minerals and elements that are present in the Earth... and thus, your physical presence is very much connected to the Mother. You can draw on her strength any time you need it. Her energy brings you back to your body, which, at some level inherently resonates with her. Your presence, current in the here and now, in this moment, with focus and intent, energetically magnifies the strength of the physical body, and the physical strength reinforces the energetic.

In appreciation for the strength that my body has, and in gratitude for the awareness of my energetic strength, I find peace with many of the stresses in my life. Not all, of course, but now I can see the difference between the things that matter and the things that don't deserve the attention I'm giving them with my worry and anxiety. Blessings to the Mother and the Father, blessings to all.

Gnomes

I've been making gnomes lately... I guess you could say I'm using my fingers to process all the rambling I've done the last few weeks! :) Actually, it's been fun... and the first family of gnomes that I completed went to live at my daughter's preschool today... so I thought I'd share. I posted more pictures and more ideas about what I'm going to make on the Pagan Parenting Resource Blog... so go check it out if you're interested in making toys. There are links to the website where I got the patterns and ideas... it's SO much fun!

These could be made with the intention to be toys... or they could be for the season table. There are lots of seasonal ideas (including making flower fairies) at the website where I got the patterns for the ones I made.

Garden spirits

I've been doing a lot of reading lately, mostly about working with nature spirits. I read Behaving as if the God in All Life Mattered, which is an amazing book about a woman named Machaelle Small Wright, who transformed both her garden and her relationships with nature and herself through communication with the devas of her land. I love that she emphasizes that this energy and information is available to anyone who wants it... and that she was a student, learning from nature how they could work together to grow a spectacular garden (and so much more!). This book is probably almost 30 years old... but when I wanted to read about the Perelandra Garden I decided to start at the beginning. I also have her book, Co-Creative Science: A revolution in science providing real solutions for today's health and environment.

It's got me thinking that I might try an experiment this year... and follow in her footsteps. I think I'm going to turn my garden boxes over to the devas... let them guide me through the next gardening season. I don't really care what the outcome is, as much as I really want to develop better relationships with the energies that are present on my property.

My introduction to Perelandra was through a friend who loaned me her Perelandra Garden Workbook II, which had some energy balancing and stabilizing directions in it... very much like spellcasting! Anyway, my older daughter needed some support at school, and I had done everything I could think of for her personally. My friend suggested clearing the energies at the school. My 6-year-old and I sat down and went through the processes... balancing with vitamins (offering them to the devas of the space to distribute them through the space where needed - energetically, of course) and stabilizing with flower essences (I used the ones I made myself... not from Perelandra). Things shifted for the class... the next time I worked in the classroom I noticed a difference in the teacher... she even gave me a hug when I left! Before that she had seemed really stressed. My daughter also reported things being easier at school... and so I considered it a success.

I also went through the energy clearing process for my house, and despite much work I had done in the last four years to clear and clean our house of unwanted energy... this was the thing that made the house seem quieter. I had long suspected that energies were living here that did not belong, but could not get them out until finding Perelandra.

Disclaimer: I'm not saying this would work for everyone... or even suggesting that you should try it. If it's going to appeal to you you'll know... and you'll follow the links on your own. This was just the thing that worked for me... and I'm sharing that with you.

Healing ourselves

One of the things I've been spending a lot of time on lately is my energy balancing class and work. I've recently started an apprenticeship with one of my teachers. Basically, the apprenticeship means that I participate as a co-practitioner with my mentor when he has a client who is willing to share their presenting issues (what they came to heal or address with the energy work), with a student.

The kind of work we do blends the idea of chi/energy/mind with the physical body. The premise is that the perception we have of our experiences can have an effect on our physical lives. But we all know this anyway... overwhelming stress can lead to ulcers, feelings of disconnection from others can often lead to heart problems... these are things we all know... and it turns out that there are many healing modalities that address well-being with this understanding.

I'm starting to understand why this form of energy balancing is working so well for me... and it's because it is about wholeness... about seeing the entire body and the whole self. It's not about taking things away (e.g. take away the feelings, take away my coping mechanisms)... it's about adding to them. Adding feelings of strength, of self-awareness, integrity, connection, and wholeness with no judgment... these are the wonderful things about what I am learning. It also gives me a new perspective in my interactions with others... about the possibilities of where people are coming from, what need they are trying to fill with their actions or words... it's something that helps a lot when I'm dealing with my children.

I'm not sure where I'm going with this... I guess the rambling is just me starting to feel the integration of so many perspectives... so often in this society we seem to have "the right one" attitude... that there is a single blanket answer that fits us all for any question that we might ask. I love most about energy balancing that there are as many answers as there are people!

Autumn

So, here we are in October... I'm reeling from that realization a bit... I mean, I feel like school just started, and it's felt more like summer around here than it felt all summer... so I still have a wee bit of disorientation going on.

However, I did change over my season table at the equinox... (this isn't the best picture, sorry, it turns out the "table" is in a corner cabinet in our dining room, and it's not the brightest room in the house... so the pics of it are always terrible... and I didn't notice that her hand is starting to unravel until I looked at the picture... funny how sometimes we don't REALLY look at things... isn't it?)...


We're also harvesting the bounty from the yard... so in some ways I'm coming in line with the season a little better. These are some of our tomatoes... which are FINALLY ripening after the long cool summer...


Oh... and look at these little beauties... looks to me like fairies have been cavorting in my garden!

I hope things slow down enough that I'll be able to start showing you all the stuff I've been working on lately! I've been making toys, gifts, and generally working on the house... so Hestia has had me busy! :)

New moon... a day late

Well, I never ended up figuring out what to do with the kids for the new moon. I'm tired... and it's showing. Anyway, today we went to the beach, and for a few minutes I felt the new moon. The ocean, she reached out for me... she showed me much of her beauty, gave me some treasures, and reminded me that it's all going to be OK.

I found several clam shells that were still hooked together. When I find these I always think of balance... and they're rare... so I tend to get excited about it. Today I found four! As I picked up shells the ocean lapped at my feet, and I felt her saying "it's ok, come with me, I'll show you". So I did. I stood there with my shells in hand, and understood that healing comes from seeing the beauty that is around us... and certainly I only had to look in my hands to see the beauty of the day, or close my eyes and listen to the beautiful sounds of the ocean, or feel my feet being cleansed by the cool water. I felt the ocean letting me know that she was willing to take the things that ailed me, to tumble them and shift them and return them as polished gifts. And isn't that part of what the new moon is about? Digging deep for those things that feel like burdens... to turn that into something new... something better... something good? Isn't that healing? So I guess it turned out alright after all...

October new moon

So, did I scare you off with my last post? LOL! I know, it came out of left-field a bit, but that's what I get (and apparently what I give you) when I spend all day blog surfing! :)

Today is the new moon once again (is it me, or are they coming around more quickly each month?). I know I love the new moon time very much, that I look forward to this more than the full moon... which I'd adored and ogled faithfully for quite awhile. Not that I've given up the full moon, but I find myself more likely to do something to acknowledge the new moon. I guess I'm feeling the healing part of that new moon energy.

Anyway, today I'm home with my 4-year-old, and I'm trying to think of something to do with her for my new moon ritual this month. I'm certainly not taking a bath with her as my last new moon went! Honestly, I'm not sure what I'm doing at the new moon anymore. I loved the way the Meet At the Water started... a group came together who felt that healing the ocean from the nightmare that happened in the Gulf was important... and it still is. But I'm feeling that it's time to open up my own new moon rituals to a greater healing... and I guess that's what happened last month when I took a bath.

So, I'm struggling last minute with a 4-year-old in tow, to figure out what that expansion means... what the theme is... and how I will do it. I'll let you know when I figure it out... in the meantime I have to go play with above-mentioned child!

Drawing parallels

I've read a couple of blogs lately where people were seeing commonalities between deities, finding themes in the energies that are choosing to work with them (because, after all, aren't we all chosen by our deities and not the other way around?). I've just realized that something like that is happening to me.

About a year ago: I was well into researching Goddesses, and Hestia found me, although our relationship is somewhat low key. We don't interact a lot, but I've definitely worked hard at making my hearth and home what I wanted it to be. I have an altar in my kitchen to Hestia, and I love her deeply, but I started researching other Goddesses to see if any would resonate. None did.

Maybe six months ago: I started researching Gods, because balance is good, and I wondered what the Gods might be like. Nothing that I read really called to me, until I had a visit from Ogmios. Who? That's what I said. Briefly, Ogmios is a Gallic deity that is often compared to Hercules and Heracles and maybe even The Dagda. He isn't referred to often in texts, and to the best of my knowledge there are no known images of him. The few references there are to him are on a couple of curse tablets and a confusing account by a 2nd century writer. A description of an image this author saw of Ogmios was of an old, short, man with a bow and a club, attached by a chain from his tongue to the ears of each man in a group of happy looking fellows (possibly a metaphor for eloquence on Ogmios' part). The few things that are guessed about Ogmios is that he's eloquent, wise, possibly a son of Brigit, possibly a teacher and guide, and according to Nostradamus Ogmios is the one who will lead the fight against the anti-Christ. Since I don't believe in the anti-Christ, I'll take that as some kind of metaphor... but I'm not sure I've ironed that out yet.




Fast forward: A few weeks ago I started receiving the Munay-Ki rites. This is a shamanic ritual consisting of nine rites that comes from medicine men and women from the Andes, and are derived from Inca traditions. These rites are thought to awaken the recipient to new levels of wisdom and self-knowledge.

A week ago: I had a dream that is very difficult to explain, because it was all about feeling and knowing, and very little about doing and seeing. Basically, I was sitting on the edge of All-That-Is with the Archangel Michael, and I think we were just shooting the breeze. Funny, because I sure don't know much about Archangels, but I'm certain that's who I was with. Unfortunately, I don't remember anything that was said in the dream.

A few nights ago: I saw Ogmios again... sort of in a half-dream state. I think he was in my room. I also think he has a shy streak... because he disappeared quickly when he realized that I saw him. He was old and stocky, and I didn't REALLY see him, I just knew he was there. And then I knew he was gone.

So, I started looking up stuff on the two of them. I knew a little about Ogmios, but nothing about Michael. It turns out that they're both reputed to be the one that leads the fight against the anti-Christ, they both serve as a psychopomp (shuttling the newly dead to the afterlife), both are known for wisdom and settling problems with words rather than the sword (ironic then, that they're also patrons of warriors), they both have 'sun things' going on around their heads (Ogmios has a 'sun-like countenance', whatever that means, and well, just look at the picture of Michael), and both seem to have something to do with me. Hmmm...

So, I'm just thinkin' out loud here... not really knowing where this is going... and not at all sure what to make of it. And wow, it turned into a REALLY long post! So thanks for hangin' in there!